Mistakes we made
by peacelight
Summary: Erik reflects on a past fight with Charles, and attempts to reconcile with Charles after the surprise rescue. One-shot


Erik Lehnsherr languished in his cell. The days had begun to blur. The boredom was unbearable at times. It had been nine years in the same bloody cell.

He wondered if he would ever escape this place. Sometimes he wished he could turn his mind off. Instead he spent the days living in the past. He couldn't sop thinking about Charles Xavier.

He knew he had hurt him, when he left. He still saw his broken body in Cuba. That day haunted him. He should have come with him. He wished he had come with him. Everything would have been different if the two of them had stayed together. Someday's he was angry at Charles, other's he was angry at himself. Most days he was angry with the world.

Erik's days were spent reliving old days, the good the bad and the in between.

Erik began daydreaming, and soon he was back in the manor. Thinking of the day Charles and him got in a fight.

* * *

"You had no right!" Erik shouted. He was so furious.

Raven and Hank took that as a sign to leave. Only Charles and Erik remained.

"I can't help myself, it just happens." Charles tried to explain.

"Bullshit!" Erik roared. "You damn well could have stopped!" Erik was well aware of how powerful Charles was.

"I know you are angry, but..." Charles tried to defend himself.

"Please! You wanted to know, you hate that I don't talk about my past!" Erik shouted.

"Well maybe you should just tell me!" Charles said. Erik could see the hurt behind the anger. But he wasn't having any of it today.

"Maybe you should mind your own business, this has nothing to do with you." Erik countered. Why couldn't Charles leave well enough alone?

"It does have to do with me. We are in a goddamn relationship!" Charles shouted.

"My future is the only thing you should worry about. I don't want you in my head, if you want to know something ask me!" Erik said. He had enough. He hated arguing with Charles. He always felt so guilty. Charles shouldn't see the worst side of humanity. He didn't want Charles's pity.

Erik walked out of the room, he slammed the door.

Erik didn't want to feel guilty. He was in the right! No matter what Charles shouldn't invade his mind.

Erik had stormed off to his room. He decided to lie down. Calm his mind. Erik was still angry an hour later, when Charles walked in.

"I'm wearing a white shirt. It's a sign of surrender, or at least a cease fire. We should talk." Charles said.

Erik just glared at him, he hoped that he would go away. Erik didn't think changing a shirt was enough of an apology.

"I see that you are still angry." Charles said softly.

Charles could never take a hint, Erik thought.

"I am not in the mood for another argument." Erik said, he was afraid of saying something he would regret.

Charles closed the door. "Everyone is outside, they will be out there for awhile."

"What does that have to do with anything," Erik asked, suddenly confused.

"I want to apologize" Charles said softly.

Charles walked over. Erik was sitting on his bed now.

"You can't take a hint, can you?" Erik said. "A white shirt isn't enough to suddenly make me feel better."

Suddenly Erik realized how Charles was going to win him over. Damn he never thought he would see this side of Charles.

Charles kissed him.

"This isn't going to work." Erik murmured. He could already feel his will power begin to crumble. How could he resist?

Charles smiled, Erik could see the nerves behind the cockiness. "I guess I should just take the shirt off."

Erik new he was going to lose this argument. "Will you please accept my apology?" The worst part was there was such serenity in his eyes.

Before Erik could even respond Charles was kissing him again. It was so sweet, so kind. Charles tenderness always melted Erik's heart.

The man knew how to apologize, Erik had to give him that.

"I forgive you." Erik moaned. Charles pulled away.

Erik kissed him. He couldn't help it. He was falling for the annoying professor. He asked personal questions, he sometimes couldn't respect boundaries, but behind all that his intentions were always pure. Erik knew that Charles never meant to hurt him.

"I promise I won't go into your mind again." Charles whispered. "I get it now, I invaded your privacy."

Erik nodded. "Just ask next time, I will tell you."

Hell if this was how Charles was going to apologize for reading his thoughts it almost seemed worth it, almost.

"I didn't think you would forgive me so easily, I had a whole night planned out." Charles said with a devious smile.

Erik couldn't help but smirk. "Perhaps I am still angry."

* * *

"Prisoner!" The guard yelled, it woke Erik up. He sighed. It was just getting to the good part.

"What the hell do you want?" Erik sighed, he was pissed now.

"You need to eat or else I will have to take the tray back." The guard said.

Erik got up from his bed.

"Didn't you notice me putting the tray down?" He asked.

Erik looked up. "You're new, aren't you?"

The guard nodded.

Erik began to pick away at the sorry excuse for mac and cheese.

"So, um...where you thinking about a girlfriend, I mean before you were smiling. I was told you never smiled." The guard was young, that was probably why he was talking, Erik thought.

"No" Erik said bluntly.

"Oh, so what were you thinking of?" The guard asked.

Erik looked up at the guard, he was looking at him as if he was an animal in a cage.

"The day I get out of here and kill every person who has wronged me." Erik smiled when he saw the look on the kids face.

"Seriously?" The kid said. "You actually have a list, you are such a super villian."

Erik laughed. "Did you think I was anything else?"

"I wasn't sure why you were here, I thought maybe...I don't know" The kid sighed.

"I am in a cage, and I can't leave, did you think I was a boy scout?" Erik asked. Scaring the new guards was one of the only things he enjoyed in this hell hole.

"I thought it maybe...I don't know maybe you could have made a mistake, I doubt with your condition and all..." The guard said.

"You want to know why I am in here?" Erik said. He was going to enjoy this.

"Sure?" The guard said.

This was for interrupting his daydream. "Killing the president."

The kids face was amusing.

"You aren't serious are you?" The kid said.

"Maybe I was trying to save him, or maybe I was trying to kill him, the true story doesn't matter." Erik said. Sometimes he wasn't even sure what the truth was.

"Ah..." The kid looked so confused.

"I am done." Erik said. There was nothing worth eating, perhaps his next meal would not be so disappointing.

"Sorry I bothered you. Anyhow, I was just thinking about what it would be like trapped by myself for the rest of my life." The kid said softly. "It just seemed when you smiled you were a normal guy."

Erik didn't know why he suddenly felt a little bad. The kid reminded him slightly of Charles. Perhaps it was the innocence, the inability to stop asking personal questions. Or the fact that even after he told him he killed the president, he didn't stop trying to talk to him.

"I was thinking about an old friend. Someone I doubt I will ever see again." Erik whispered. He hated his feeling of agony. He realized once again no matter how much he dreamed and wished he would never she Charles again. He would never smile at him.

When Erik looked up the guard was gone. Erik doubted he even heard him. He was glad. He didn't want someone to hear his weakness.

* * *

Months passed in this cycle. No more guards talked to Erik. His days passed in quite reflection. Soon all Erik had left was his anger at Charles. He was so angry that he hadn't chosen him. He abandoned all the mutants, his brothers and sisters, him!

Erik would never have imagined that it would be Charles that came to rescue him. He never thought Charles would be the one to throw a punch, he never thought he would give up his telepathy. Erik would never have thought he would be sitting on a plane with Charles on the way to Paris to stop Mystique from killing a man. This was a strange day.

Erik recognized that he wasn't the only one angry, Charles had made it clear that he hated him. It hurt.

Erik thought that a game of chess for old times sake would help.

"_I'm sorry Charles._" Erik said, looking directly at Charles. Erik saw the small head shake, the pain in Charles's eyes. "_For what happened._"

"_I truly am_." Erik said, hoping that Charles would say something. Instead he took a swing of the scotch, he finished what remained in the glass.

Charles simply stated. "_It's been a long time since I've played._"

Erik felt like there was still hope. He wanted to believe it. "_I will go easy on you. It might finally be a fair fight._"

Charles glared at him. "If you think I needed telepathy to beat you, you are sorely mistaken."

Charles made his first move. Erik countered. For a short while Erik felt like he was back in Charles's manor. He could feel Charles's eyes on him.

"Just like old times." Erik smiled.

"If you think this game changes anything you must be crazier than I thought." Charles hissed. He probably didn't want to wake Logan.

"I thought you lost your abilities." Erik said.

"I never needed my abilities to know what you were thinking." Charles said.

"You must admit this is nice, tell me you didn't miss this, you didn't think of me once in ten years." Erik said, trying to make Charles smile. He would take a twitch.

"I did everything in my power not to think of you." Charles said bluntly.

Erik sighed, this was going to be harder than he hoped. "I thought of you, a lot."

"Good for you" Charles said sarcastically. Charles took another sip of scotch. He definitely drank more than he did before.

"I thought of our fights, we did seem to have a knack for getting into arguments." Erik said. Charles only glared at him. "And I remember you were always good at apologizing."

Erik saw something change in Charles, he thought perhaps he had warmed up to the idea of him being back. Instead he stood up abruptly. He walked to the bathroom without a word and closed the door.

Erik considered his options. He knew that once he killed Mystique Charles would never forgive him, this was his only chance.

He followed, the lock was nothing to him. He opened it, closed the door behind him, and re-locked it. The two were trapped together.

Charles was splashing water on his face. "Erik leave now!"

Erik closed the door. "I'd rather not."

Charles faced him. "What makes you think reminding me of the past is a good thing?"

"Don't you miss it?" Erik said, as he walked closer to Charles. Charles stepped back, but he was stuck between the wall and Erik. "I miss it, I miss you."

"I think you are only remembering certain parts of the past." Charles said. Erik could see the hurt behind the anger. It was a knife to his heart.

"Those parts were great though." Erik whispered, going for it anyways. "Stolen moments on trips, sneaking around the manner."

"Those moments are done." Charles stated.

"Are you sure, how easy it would it be?" Erik licked his lips. "Just once for old time sakes."

"I see no reason for that." Charles whispered.

Erik hoped he was hearing a nerves in his voice, he was hoping that Charles wanted him too.

Erik took a risk and he kissed Charles. With ten years worth of pent-up energy.

For a wonderful moment Charles kissed him back. And all too fast Charles pushed him away.

"You think that one bloody kiss will make me forget how you left me, bleeding on a beach without a second thought." Charles said, with more anger that Erik could imagine.

"You could have come with me." Erik said. "You chose."

"You were the one to walk away, you think I would be okay with the murder of innocent people!" Charles yelled. "You used me. I thought you actually cared about me!"

"Of course I did!" Erik retorted he couldn't help himself, he had to fight back. . "You have lived in a bubble, it may shock you to know but the world isn't as kind. May I remind you about what the future becomes. Humans killing mutants!"

"Has it even crossed your mind this is you fault! You made it damn clear that you considered the humans our enemies! You killed there fucking president!" Charles yelled.

Erik was sure that both Logan and Hank were awake by now.

"I told you I was trying to save him." Erik hissed.

"Then he would be alive," Charles sneered. "I know how powerful you are. In case you forgot I saw you master your power."

Erik was getting angrier. "You always knew what I wanted, I never hid my intentions from you!"

"And I made damn clear that there was another way. Tell me was your revenge worth it! Was it worth losing me?" Charles asked point blank.

Erik froze he didn't answer. He knew his future intentions would destroy any chance of Charles picking him. That moment of hesitation was what cost him.

"That's what I thought." Charles shoved him and unlocked the door. "And you were right I am the only one who is good at apologizing."

Erik wished he had said something. He had wanted to go back so many times but it was too late now. It was probably best Charles didn't want him anymore. It would make what he had to do easier now.

* * *

**Author's Note: I wanted to write this fic to show how things have changed. I couldn't help writing about them being much more cute and forgiving, but after seeing dofp I doubt that Charles was going to forgive Erik no matter what he said. I hope you guys liked it. Sorry for any mistakes.**

**Italics are for parts right out of the movie (I used a gifset and my memory so it might not be exactly right)**


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